What’s Your Doritos Bag? When the Smallest Things Make You Miss Home After Hijrah

You will be shocked at what little, small thing can have this domino effect where suddenly you’re rethinking your entire life.

I’m telling you. It’s crazy, but it’s true! For me, it was a bag of Doritos. I talked about that whole experience in The Egyptian Doritos That Made Me Cry.

For you, it could be a certain flower that you saw, the same flower you used to see outside of your mother’s house. And that one really hits home, because you truly don’t know the next time you’ll see her.

Or maybe it could be the smell of a certain baked good or a food you didn't realize you missed until it randomly hit you as you were walking home. The wind brought that lovely scent to your nostrils uninvited, and now suddenly your heart is swelling and tears are rising as you hear your family's laughter in your mind, reverberating around the meal you all made together.

Or you could stumble across something you packed from home and realize you may not be able to find it again. Maybe it was even gifted to you.

Then the emotions come. The thoughts. The memories.

And then you’re thinking:

Should I have even done this? Is this the right decision?

You can still be fully on board with your hijrah while those thoughts are flooding your mind and your heart.

Like, no. I wanted to make hijrah. I want to be here.

But it’s hard.

Part of adjusting is having to try things out and see what works for you, and that’s literally a lot of what hijrah is.

Trial and error.

You have to kind of be in this middle place of really being able to adjust and adapt very quickly, and in a lot of different ways.

And that can be kind of scary because you want to root. You want to have everything familiar. You want to know everything.

Especially when you’re coming from a place you’ve lived in for the majority of your life. Especially, especially coming from the West, where we're accustomed to certain conveniences and ways of how things work. But this can apply to any country that you come from.

You really have to just be open. You really have to be fluid.

And all of that rooting, all of that cementing yourself, needs to be in Allah alone.

Instead of grounding yourself completely in the country you’re in, the place you’re living, or the people around you, that grounding needs to be in Allah and in trusting Him.

Because things around you are going to change. Something may not work out. Something may not be what you expected. You may have to adjust again.

And if everything in you is rooted in those things being a certain way, when they change, it can completely throw you off. It can even feel devastating or like a betrayal.

Allah is the constant.

I’m not saying to be disconnected or callous. I’m saying Allah alone has to be what you’re truly rooted in. That trust in Allah is what’s going to get you through all of the trials, challenges, and adjustments of hijrah.

Hijrah is a huge challenge. There are things no one can really prepare you for, and things I feel like no one really tells you about.

It’s going to be hard.

But the rewards are so beautiful. They’re so immense. It’s worth every challenge, every test, every trial. It’s worth the tears and the homesickness.

And we have to remind ourselves:

Okay, why are we making hijrah? Why are we doing this?

Allah’s Messenger ﷺ said:

“The emigration of one who emigrates for the sake of Allah and His Messenger ﷺ is for the sake of Allah and His Messenger ﷺ.”

Sahih Muslim 1907a

And Allah knows every ounce of your hardship.

He knows every trial and challenge that He’s putting you through, and He knows what you went through to endure it.

We have to remember that Allah promises relief with hardship.

Allah says:

“Verily, along with every hardship is relief,

Verily, along with every hardship is relief (i.e. there is one hardship with two reliefs, so one hardship cannot overcome two reliefs).”

Surat Ash-Sharh, 94:5–6 — Al-Hilali & Khan

And Allah is with As-Sabirun. He is with the patient.

Allah says:

“O you who believe! Seek help in patience and As-Salât (the prayer). Truly! Allâh is with As-Sâbirûn (the patient).”

Surat Al-Baqarah, 2:153 — Al-Hilali & Khan

And yes, these are all the deep lessons that I’m going through in my head as I’m staring at a depressing bag of “Doritos”.

But this is what triggers that, right?

And if you’ve had one of these moments, I want to know:

What is your Doritos bag?

What was your thing that kind of “triggered” you? Share in the comments or reach out to me. I’d love to hear from you!!